Friday, May 13, 2011

The Mayonnaise Jar and 2 Cups of Coffee

When things in your life seems almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day is not enough
remember the mayonnaise jar and 2 cups of coffee.

A professor stood before his philosophy class
and had some item in front of him
when the class began, wordlessly
he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceed to fill it up with golf balls.

He then asked his students, if the jar was full.
They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar.
He shoke the jar lightly.
The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls.

He then asked the students again if the jar was full.
They again agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sanf and poured it into the jar.
Of course, the sand filled up everything else.
He asked once more, if the jar was full. The students responded with an unanimous 'yes'.

The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under his table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling up any empty spaces in the jar.

The students laughed.

"Now," said the professor, as the laughter subsided,
"I want you to recognise that this jar represents your life.
The golf balls are the important things - family, friends, health and favorite passions - that that if everthing else was lost, and only they remainded, your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matters like your job, house, and car.

The sand is everything else - the small stuff."

"If you out the sand into the jar first," he continued,
"there will not be room for the pebbles of the golf balls.
The same goes for life.

If your spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you.

So...

Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness,
play with your children
tale time to get medical checkups
take your partner out for dinner.

There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal."

"Take care of the golf balls first, the things that really matter.
Set your priorities.
The rest is just sand"

One of the student raised her hand and asked what the coffee represented.

The professor smiled.
"I'm glad you asked.

"It just goes to show that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with your friends"

Moral of the Story

The parts of the body were having a meeting, trying to decide who was in charge.

Each organ took a turn to speak up.
Brain ..... I should be in charge because I run all body functions.
Blood ..... I should be charge because I circulate oxygen for the brain.
Stomach ..... I should be in charge because I process food for the brain.
Legs .... I should be in charge because I take the brain where it wants to go.
Eyes ..... I should be in charge because I let the brain see where it's going.
Asshole ..... I should be in charge because I get rid of your waste.

All the other body parts laughed so hard and this made the asshole very mad.

To prove his points, the asshole immediately slammed tightly closed and stayed that way for 6 days, refusing to rid the body of any waste whatsoever.

Day 1 ..... Brain got a terrible headache and cried out for relief
Day 2 ..... Stomach got bloated and began to ache terribly
Day 3 ..... Legs got cramps and became unstable
Day 4 ..... Eyes became watery and vision became blurred
Day 5 ..... Blood became toxic and poisoned the body
Day 6 ..... The other body parts agreed to let the asshole be in charge

MORAL OF THE STORY
NO MATTER WHO YOU ARE, OR HOW IMPORTANT YOU THINK YOU ARE,
YOU WILL FIND THAT IT IS ALWAYS AN ASSHOLE THAT IS TRULY IN CHARGE.