NEW BUDGET AIRLINES RULES

Budget airlines with ‘no-frills’ may come to this stage one day!

Attendant: Welcome aboard ‘Ala Carte Air’, Sir. May I see your ticket?

Passenger: Sure.

Attendant: You're in seat 12B. That will be RM5, please!

Passenger: What for?

Attendant: For telling you where to 'Sit'.

Passenger: But I already knew where to sit.

Attendant: Nevertheless, we are now charging a seat locator fee of RM5. It's the Airline's new Policy.

Passenger: That's the craziest thing I ever heard. I won't pay it.

Attendant: Sir, do you want a seat on this flight, or not?

Passenger: Yes, yes. All right, I'll pay. But the airline is going to hear about this.

Attendant: Thank you. My goodness, your carry-on bag looks heavy. Would you like me to stow it in the overhead compartment for you?

Passenger: That would be swell, thanks.

Attendant: No problem. Up we go, and done! That will be RM10, please.

Passenger: What?!

Attendant: The airline now charges a RM10 carry-on assistance fee.

Passenger: This is extortion! I won't stand for it!

Attendant: Actually, you're right, you can't stand. You need to sit, and fasten your seat belt. We're about to push back from the gate. But, first I need that RM10.

Passenger: No way!

Attendant: Sir, if you don't comply, I will be forced to call the Air Marshal. And you really don't want me to do that.

Passenger: Why not? Is he going to 'shoot’ me?

Attendant: No, but there's a RM50 Air-Marshal hailing fee.

Passenger: Oh, all right! Here, take the RM10. I can't believe this!

Attendant: Thank you for your cooperation, sir. Is there anything else I can do for you?

Passenger: Yes. It's stuffy in here, and my overhead fan doesn't seem to work. Can you fix it?

Attendant: Your overhead fan is not broken, Sir. Just insert three 20 sen coins into the overhead coin slot for the first five minutes.

Passenger: The airline is charging me for cabin air?!

Attendant: Of course not, sir. Stagnant cabin air is provided free of charge. It's the circulating air that costs 60 sen.

Passenger: I don't have any coins. Can you make change for a ringgit?

Attendant: Certainly, Sir! Here you go!

Passenger: But you've given me only one 20 sen coin for my ringgit.

Attendant: Yes, there's a 'change making fee' of 20 sen.

Passenger: For crying out loud! All I have left is 20 sen? What the heck can I do with this?

Attendant: Hang onto it. You'll need it later for the lavatory.

What they don't teach you in Business School ..........

Johnny wanted to have sex with a girl in his office, but she belonged to someone else... One day, Johnny got so frustrated that he went up to her and said, 'I'll give you a $ 100 if you let me have sex with you. But the girl said NO. Johnny said, 'I'll be fast. I'll throw the money on the floor, you bend down, and I'll be finished by the time you pick it up. ' She thought for a moment and said that she would have to consult her boyfriend... So she called her boyfriend and told him the story. Her boyfriend says, 'Ask him for $ 200, pick up the money very fast, he won't even be able to get hispants down.' So she agrees and accepts the proposal.

Half an hour goes by, and the boyfriend is waiting for his girlfriend to call. Finally, after 45 minutes, the boyfriend calls and asks what happened. She responded, 'The bastard used coins!'

Management lesson:

Always consider a business proposal in its entirety before a greeing to it and getting screwed!